tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I just had sex on a roof
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
