..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
