I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
