Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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