so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
