oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
