I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Randomize
