i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize