She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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