Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
