Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(713): View more from Texas

just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.

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(775): View more from Nevada

You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid

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(530): View more from California

is this the sara with the beer cane?

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(865): View more from Tennessee

Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.

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(727): View more from Florida

One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.

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(205): View more from Alabama

I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.

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