when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
