Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
