And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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