You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize
