Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
