but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Randomize
