I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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