You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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