1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
