we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
Just cropdusted the office
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
