is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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