im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
