didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
