Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
