We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
