how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
