It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I think a kid would responsible me up
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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