No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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