Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize