He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
