OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
