No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
