he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
