How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
