Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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