they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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