Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
