I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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