Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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