OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Randomize
