we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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