It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
they're like a gay fantastic four
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
