My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
