before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
