how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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