I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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