found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
