It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
