with your own penis?
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Randomize
