I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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