Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Randomize
